|
48 THINGS FOR YOU TO DO THAT CAN
SIGNIFICANTLY by nationally-known custody experts
First,
just quickly read over these Checklist Items: 1. [ ]
Hire the “RIGHT” lawyer. We have
found---during our 35 years in the field---that hiring the correct lawyer is
the MOST IMPORTANT action that you can take!
You need a family law and child custody expert who additionally knows
key local-jurisdiction facts. 2. [ ]
Get recommendations for the “RIGHT” lawyer. (From your local Bar Association or
the American Academy of Matimonial Lawyers.) 3. [ ]
Make a list of the weaknesses of the other person. (“The other person" is
usually your spouse or former spouse, but may be grandparents, foster parents,
siblings, or even the State.) 4. [ ]
Make a list of the strengths of the
other person. (This is really important! It is too easy to concentrate on the other persons weaknesses and
what they do wrong---here we want you to list what they do RIGHT.) Your most important ally is your
believability. You get this by showing
an even-handed approach. 5. [ ]
Make a list of your strengths. 6. [ ]
Make a list of your weaknesses. (Be brutally HONEST! Only you and your
lawyer will see the list.) 7. [ ]
List the strengths in your present position---looked at from the view
of the judge. (job? economics? parents help? etc.?) 8. [ ]
List the strengths of the other person in their present position. 9. [ ]
Decide if you should be the first to initiate the suit. 10.
[ ] Decide if you should try to settle
the case. 11.
[ ] Write out a “Draft Custody
Plan.” List everything that you want as
if you will be able to get everything that you want---you won’t get everything
but making this list is a good start.) 12.
[ ] Make a list of which points in your
“Draft Custody Plan are negotiable. (Things that you want but would give
up to get something else.) 13.
[ ] Decide if you should start
negotiating with the other person. (However, never work behind your attorney’s
back!) 14.
[ ] Make a list of the “bargaining
chips” that you have. 15.
[ ] Decide if you should work
out a temporary custody plan with the other person. 16.
[ ] Find out what criteria your family
court looks at when awarding custody. 17.
[ ] Find out if your judge has specific
prejudices. (Calmness on the witness stand, even-handed approach, blond hair,
women or men, successful women, athletic looking men, etc.) 18.
[ ] Find out if the other person is
using alienating strategies. 19.
[ ] If the other person IS using
alienating strategies, put into effect a plan to counteract these strategies. This is an exceedingly important and complex
issue. You must develop a set of
strategies that does not include alienating strategies on your part. 20.
[ ] Decide if the other person may make
false allegations in court. (What would
they be?) 21.
[ ] Decide how to refute any false
allegations. 22.
[ ] Make a list of witnesses that you
have to refute potential allegations. ITEMS 23
through 27 are to be accomplished WITH your attorney. 23.
[ ]
Write down, for each witnesses, how they should dress and act in court. 24.
[ ] Decide how you should act in
court. 25.
[ ] Choose the clothes you will
wear in court. 26.
[ ] Decide if this is the right time to start dating. 27.
[ ] Decide if this is the right time to
move in with your new “significant other.” 28.
[ ] Make a list of the marital assets. 29.
[ ] Include in the list when each
asset came into the marriage. 30.
[ ] Include how each asset came
into the marriage. 31.
[ ] Calculate how much insurance is
in-force that would go to you and your child. 32.
[ ] Calculate how much insurance you
and your child actually need. 33.
[ ] Medical coverage? 34.
[ ] Write down the education plans for
your child and for yourself. 34.
[ ] Make a list of your future
potential earnings. 35.
[ ] Think about what could happen to
increase or decrease your future earnings potential. 36.
[ ] Make a list of the other persons
estimated future income. 37.
[ ] Write down any special earnings
potential of the other person. 38.
[ ] Decide if your child is being
bribed. 39.
[ ] If yes, decide on a course of
action to counteract these bribes. (See Item 19.) 40.
[ ] Make a list (by subject) of the
important things you HAVE NOT told your lawyer. (You don’t want any surprises
in court.) LIST arrests, bankruptcy,
affairs, fights---EVERYTHING!) 41.
[ ] Consider if there is a sickness or
disability to be considered. 42.
[ ] Make a list of any of the ways that
you can help control legal costs. 43.
[ ] Decide what to do if the other
person wants to relocate, 44.
[ ] Decide if you may want to
relocate...now or later. 45.
[ ] Decide if you need a Custody
Evaluation to help your case. 46.
[ ] Hire the “RIGHT” Evaluator? Get
recommendations from: your lawyer, friends, the Professional Academy of Custody
Evaluators (PACE), etc. (Many judges
however, will provide a list of evaluators for you and your attorney to choose
from.) 47.
[ ] Decide if the other person is trying to “get your goat.” 48.
[ ] Consider how it would help the
other person if you did get angry? “TAKE
YOUR TIME. Now that you have looked
over the questions once, go back over each question again---carefully--- and
make notes. Re-hash your answers with a close friend or relative. Dig out every fact that can help your case.
You
can do it! " 
IF YOU: 1)
ENERGETICALLY FOLLOW THE CHECKLIST ABOVE, (2) DIG OUT ALL OF THE NECESSARY
ANSWERS AND WRITE THEM DOWN, AND (3) COMMUNICATE ALL OF THAT INFORMATION TO
YOUR LAWYER, WITNESSES, ETC. YOU
CAN SIGNIFICANTLY HELP YOUR CASE! Warm
regards and Good Luck, Dr.
Barry Bricklin and Dr. Gail Elliot A
complete discussion of each of the Checklist Items above (including the
strategies and answers that will work best for you in Family Court) are
included in the Year 2004 Child Custody Package by Dr. Barry
Bricklin and Dr. Gail Elliot. Their Custody
Package also includes 189 other important actions that will help you
prepare your custody case. Everything
is thoroughly covered by Dr. Bricklin and Dr. Elliot in a clean,
straightforward manner that you will have no trouble understanding. It is like they are taking you hand-in-hand
and guiding you through this treacherous, gut-wrenching process. You owe
it to yourself and your family to review their letter/outline at
www.custodycenter.com Since 1991 Dr.
Bricklin and Dr. Elliot have helped thousands and thousands of mothers and
fathers make their best case for custody! |
